The BEST Justice League Trailer Breakdown Extravaganza Event of the Hour, Seriously, Click Bait, Words

Okay, Warner Brothers released their “first” official trailer for Justice League by the “auteur” Zack “300” Snyder over the weekend.  I’m here to break it down and give you all of the necessary and important details that you don’t need.  As you may have guessed, it was epic, but underwhelming; hopeful, but poorly lit; White Stripes, but a poor cover of the Beatles; Ben Affleck, and, well, actually, yea, this movie has a solid cast.  And here. We. Go;

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So… Batman Begins?
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so these boxes are essentially DC’s infinity stones?
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Okay, so I know Aquaman often sucks, but this trailer makes him badass
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yea, i’m pretty convinced Jason Mamoa’s Aquaman is going to be one of my favorite parts.  Also love the eye contact lenses
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OOOHHHH, so DC film heroes can save people?  Cool.  Just checking.
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Yea, no joke here.  Aquaman is awesome. (Bro-ey and hopefully not a douche, but awesome)
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another infinity box/stone/macguffin. and is he bad rebooted RoboCop, or just a transformer?
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glad more than one save people
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way to reuse footage from that other “first” trailer from comic-con, just try to be more lazy Warner Brothers.  Though check out Batfleck sitting in the corner, now that’s a rich Bond villain pose right there.
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the other Avenger Justice League member, Quicksilver Flash
jl-but really not bad.jpg
On a serious note, Ezra Miller is one of the finest actors of this upcoming generation.  Any role he does should be taken seriously.  Even if he is the third Quicksilver.
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Batman kicking an Oz monkey on the Fantastic FourStick alien planet
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SMILES!!!!!!!
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She stole the show the last time, her upcoming movie looks great, yea, she’s gonna be the champ of this film, I can feel it
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*Christian Bale Batman voice* “Where are the other drugs going?”
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so i’ve been told these aren’t Oz monkeys but the same thingies from Batman’s dream in BvS.  Parademons.  Pawns of Darkseid, which is German for Darkside (it isn’t).  But Darkseid isn’t slated to be in this film.  But his general Steppenwolf is.  So there’s that to look forward too.  Also, Aquaman just killin it, AGAIN.  
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Gal Gadot’s Wonder Woman kicking ass without the need for CGI
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Iron Man?
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yea this is pretty cool
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“I’m CEO, bitch”
jl-just no no batman spider crawlers just no zack.jpg
Least favorite part of the trailer.  Nothing snarky to say.  Just I don’t need to see an overload of Batman gadgets.  I don’t need a vehicle for him to climb up walls.  He has a grappling hook.  That’s all he needs!  This was just excessive and wreaks of studio exec interference.
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I don’t know her powers well enough to explain what she’s doing to her shield. But it’s bright.  You’re on the internet, go Google it if you’re so interested.
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“Why wasn’t I nominated for Arrival?”
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Another box for Thanos to steal.  Also Amber Heard as Queen Mera of Atlantic City

 

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Ugh, another hand on prison glass cliche courtesy of “auteur” Zach “Guardians of Ga’Hoole” Snyder.  But yay! Dr. Manhattan!
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This is good casting.  Both solid actors who look strikingly similar.  Way to cast Billy Crudup as Barry Allen’s Dad.  Another win for the DCEU casting department.
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Okay, after BvS, I wasn’t sold on the whole​ bright blue lightning touches, but in this film it seems like the action is easier to follow with The Flash and this shot is just pretty.
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I like how there is not Batman or Superman in this shot.  Also Momoa twirling the trident is just such a goshdarn great touch.

Yea, this movie looks cool.  Hopefully the script is better this time and Snyder actually listened to the plotting and character criticisms of the last film and not the complaints about the tone (which was not the primary problem of the last two Superman centered films).  Also I liked Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice more than most.

Also, Aquaman, Batfleck, and Gadot’s Wonder Woman is in this.  Those reasons alone will make this film worth seeing, even if it’s bad.

Post Script: I am no expert on DC Comics.  But I do love Batman.  And I guess soon Aquaman?  Vincent Chase he is not.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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